January 29, 2013 - Rainbow Baby!

We have some big news…we are expecting our rainbow baby on September 20th!

We were a little caught off guard when we got a positive pregnancy test on January 12th. My heart tells me that Kassidy is looking out for us. My empty arms were longing for a baby, and it turns out God had a plan to fill our arms just after our 25th birthdays. We are so thankful and blessed! This baby was conceived just 8 weeks after Kassidy joined God.

Almost immediately,  I went into the doctor to get a blood test to check my progesterone levels and hcg numbers. For those that are not familiar, progesterone is the hormone that is required to sustain a pregnancy. At 4 weeks, the normal numbers are usually 12-20. My number came back at 22 – fantastic. HCG is the pregnancy hormones that shows the pregnancy is progressing like it should. This number should double every 48 hours. My number jumped from 160 to 426 – also fantastic. My nerves were shot the first week, I was worried for a miscarriage (well, I still am) as I lost our first baby to a miscarriage at 5 weeks and 6 days along.

We announced our “rainbow” baby to our families and close friends, and awaited an early ultrasound that was set for Monday, January 28th (yesterday). I would be about 6 weeks along and they would look for a heartbeat. I had been so scared to get bad news that I began to lose sleep the week leading up to the ultrasound. I researched online what I should look for at the u/s. I read that we should see a gestational sac, yolk sac, a fetal pole and possibly a heartbeat – although sometimes if the conception date is off, a heartbeat may not be visible yet.

I paid attention to my symptoms. I would feel queasy in cars and in the middle of the night, however I wasn’t sick. I never had morning sickness with Kassidy, so I didn’t worry about this. I had cravings and continual hunger. I was very emotional, more than how I was when I am grieving. I was crying over everything!

Stevie met up with me for the appointment. We were called back and an internal ultrasound began. The woman pointed out the gestation sac. I thought to myself, check. She pointed out the yolk sac.Check. Fetal pole, aka baby. Check. She kept trying to find a heartbeat. She commented on how tiny the baby was, she even said that if we had come in just one day before, she may not have even seen the baby because I was early. Stevie and the technician SAW a heart beating, but since baby was so small, we didn’t get to hear it or find out how fast it was. I still felt like this was a pretty good appointment. I am reassured baby is okay! Thank you Kassidy!!! The woman said, “One baby,” and I jokingly laughed and asked “No twins?”

We met with Dr. Connors, and discussed the ultrasound. Dr. Connors said that everything looked great, she was very happy with the results. She said that the technician recommended we have an ultrasound at 10 weeks because she would be able to see the brain then. “YES.” We answered. Anything for reassurance. We also decided that I would have the 1st trimester screening with the specialist at 12 weeks to check for additional abnormalities. Trisomy 13 and 18 are fears in addition to neural tube defects, omphaloceles and heart defects…because Kassidy’s fingers were crossed. That is a sign of those defects.

Dr. Connors must understand that I worry a lot, she offered to have us come back in 2 weeks for another u/s to actually hear the heartbeat and get a heartrate. So as it stands, I will have ultrasounds at 8 weeks, 10 weeks and 12 weeks. If all is well after that, we will be treated as a healthy pregnancy and I can drop my “high risk” status. I’m relieved I get extra care this first trimester. It will ease my stress level drastically. I also learned I have a tilted uterus, and baby is waaaay up towards my back. I’m happy the baby is snuggled up higher, it makes me think he/she is extra protected in there.

Another big moment this week: our priest, Fr. Sergio, blessed this unborn baby. He did the same for Kassidy about 2 weeks after her diagnosis. This time, my in-laws and a few of Stevie’s siblings attended. It was beautiful!!! We prayed for a healthy and worry-free pregnancy. (Thanks for setting this up Jean!)

I’m hoping and praying that this pregnancy is “it” – our healthy  baby we finally get to keep and take home with us. Each day I wake up thankful to still be pregnant with him/her. I may only be 6 ½ weeks along, but I feel a strong connection already and love the baby so much!  I know our guardian angel is with us every moment – we miss Kassidy so much…

We will keep you all posted on progress with our “rainbow baby.” We are already suspecting it’s a BOY. We will find out in April